Pooped on the Tragedy of the Carnival Triumph: "Review of 'Trainwreck: Poop Cruise'"

Last weekend, I finally found a Netflix account I could access and had been waiting to watch the documentary "Trainwreck: Poop Cruise." Before saying goodbye to my parents after a weekend visit, Phil and I turned on the episode of the new docuseries to see what all the hype was about.

We have been loyal Carnival cruise passengers since  2010. This loyalty only came into question after Carnival announced tragic changes to their "loyalty" program, more to come on that in another post. We have had little to no issues with our cruises. The worst thing to happen to us was the fire alarm went off at 4 a.m. on departure day. We are lucky. However, we cannot say the same for everyone who has been on a cruise.

Synopsis

Netflix's released a documentary on the 2013 Carnival Triumph sailing that ended up with the moniker "Poop Cruise." What was to be a three-day sailing from Galveston, Texas, to Cozumel, Mexico, ended up a being a seven-day nightmare for the 4,200 passengers and crew. The documentary focused on the story from the perspectives of three groups of passengers (and the parent of one child who was on land), former CNN new anchor Brooke Baldwin, Carnival's public relations team, Carnival crew and a lawyer. 

On February 11, 2013, a fire broke out in the aft engine room at 5:30 a.m. CST. No injuries occurred and the crew was able to get a generator to work. This did affect the toilets and plumbing, which resulted in a suggested protocol of using showers for urine and red biohazard bags for poop. Despite the suggestions, people used the toilets to relieve themselves.

Imagine creating a poop lasagna, as was suggested by the kitchen staff member, Abhi. Sorry to be graphic, but they started it.

The Carnival Triumph stalled in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico. The goal was to move the ship to Progreso, Mexico, but it floated further into the middle of the body of water. Passing ships delivered more supplies before tug boats came to the rescue, taking the ship to Mobile, Alabama four days later than it's scheduled arrival in the U.S. 

The Passengers

We met three sets of passengers:

- Devin, traveling with his fiance and future in-laws

- Ashley, Jayne and Kalin, a group part of Ashley's bachelorette party.

- Larry and Rebekah, a father-daughter duo who were taking a cruise together. Rebekah was 12 at the time of the cruise, with her mother, Mary, on-land.

Devin tells us about being recently engaged and taking his first trip with his future in-laws. Devin is desperately seeking approval from his future father-in-law, who we see in a couple of photos. When all hell breaks loose, Devin is adamant he will not poop in a bag. His mission is to hold it in (how's that morning coffee kicking in, Devin?) or find a working toilet, all while impressing FIL. Before he poops himself, Devin finds a working toilet. That is a solid currency in this situation, so he shares only with his family. I guess that was enough to impress FIL because Devin marries fiancé and continues to vacation with everyone, but not on cruises. I do not care for Devin's story. Was Devin never exposed to a dirty diaper or having to pick up after a pet? Shit happens, Devin. 

Ashley, Jayne and Kalin are on the Triumph to celebrate Ashley's bachelorette. A cruise is an ideal set-up for any party like this: three-days at sea, with plenty of bars, lots of food and your sleeping quarters within stumbling distance. We learned about the group's penchant for drinking to excess (as we do, right Gina?) and witnessing a live sex show. The group took a cavalier approach to the seriousness of being on a floating city. One of the women states they did not go to the muster station for a safety briefing, which is impossible. The ship cannot legally leave port without everyone having completed the muster safety briefing. Their ignorance reeked of "main character" desperation and I would actively avoid them on this trip. 

The real story should have been Larry and Rebekah. The father-daughter duo looking for some bonding time amid his divorce from ex-wife Mary. Mary was featuring her perspective as an on-shore worried mother. We know Larry and Rebekah were scared, but what did they do to survive? How did Larry entertain his 12-year-old daughter without a pre-teen club open? Was the pre-teen club open? Where did they stay? None of this was answered. Mary was shown as being clearly worried for her daughter. 

When one of the ships is close enough to deliver supplies, the passengers are able to get a wifi signal. That's when #CruiseFromHell and the media stories began to break out. Mary also hears from her daughter, who is quick to speak to the media as well. Nothing is better than hearsay.

The Crew

We meet four crew members who were on the Triumph. Upfront, the on-board crew make the cruise. From guest services to entertainment to cleaning staff, they put in the hours to make sure the guests have an incredible time. These people are trained to take the brunt of the arrogance, negativity and harassment from passengers, which they handle with grace and conviction. How they do that with this shit show happening, I cannot imagine!

Jen, the cruise director, is the star of the show. We always make a point to meet the cruise director and entertainment staff, with most of them being the most joyful, optimistic and realistic people on the ship. The cruise director is the face of the ship and the one delivering the messages. We heard Jen's announcements on the cruise throughout the episode and what adversity she faces when trying to aid her 4,200 guests and crew. 

Meanwhile, Hanna, a bartender, is enjoying the sexual liberties with the crew. Hanna's stories are the ones I dig up whenever I am on a cruise. I want to know the salacious details and she is sharing the dirty details. Hanna shared how the crew also like to have a life, which is valid, and there is bed hopping, which is exciting. When she admits to being in bed of another crew member's after a party, it tells me that life is just life for them on a ship. However, we learned little from Hanna about her responsibilities on the ship during this time. She watched an engineer put on his overalls and get to work. From what I have seen of the engineer staff, they do not wear much underneath. So go Hanna, congratulations on the sex.

Abhi is part of the kitchen staff, which has to be one of the most stressful jobs. He was one of many cooking for all the guests. I suggest watching another documentary like The Secret Life of the Cruise on Prime Video to see just what goes into preparing for a cruise. When Abhi constantly exclaimed "fuck" in each soundbite, I believed that was his authentic reaction. The cruise is only stocked for the three days, then replenished when they get into port for the next group. When he makes the sandwiches, I believed that is what was only available. When people hoarded food, I believed that is not just survival - that's cruise life. Abhi's story is one I want to know more of.

And we have Stephen. He worked in guest services, most likely he handled a lot of frustrated passengers with limited information. Distress calls to the shore on his satellite phone were all he could do. Guest service team members are not always the most pleasant, but they do what they can.

An interesting aspect to the many ways the crew had to manage the guests was opening the bar. I side with Jen on this as it would be a mistake. When the ship malfunctioned, the society of the ship also malfunctioned. Order was not as it was. Alcohol just made it worse, and I am surprised more injuries did not occur from this decision.

The Media and Public

Like all media outlets, CNN found a way to twist the story from multiple angles. It is like when CBS had a numerologist try to predict the winner of Survivor: Borneo (clip not available except in my head) - just find something to keep eyes on the screen. As a former public relations specialist, I felt for Buck Banks. That is a shitstorm no one wants to manage, but at the point when #CruiseFromHell was trending on Twitter, what else can you do? Much like CNN spinning the story, Banks' job would be to do the same. None of the passengers win in this case too. They are relying on limited information and points of view to create the narrative, much like this documentary. 

I am opting not to talk about the lawyer, who I think was just finding a way to bank on this. He reminds me of Lionel Hutz chasing the ambulance down the street. Sure, these people needed compensation, which they got. Was it enough? That's for the passengers to speak on.

Overall, this was a floater.

The documentary stunk worse than the actual smells from the infamous Poop Cruise. They sensationalized the situation like CNN did, with a limited focus on the horrors. The cruise has to have been a lot worse than what was shown. More guest accounts that were not so narrow might have shown the terrors and fears.

Carnival has since changed it's many methods to ensure safety for the passengers and crew. I can say that I have seen the many safety checks on the cruises I have been on. Even when the fire alarm went off at 4 a.m., the crew was quick to react and ensure no danger was present to the passengers. It is not to say these things will not happen in the future, but cruises want to keep sailing so they will prioritize these measures. The documentary is worth a watch just to see the silliness of some of those interviewed, but do not let this deter you from cruising.

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I'll be posting more about our cruise travels.